GETTING WOOD IN PROSPECT HEIGHTS

One of the things that drives me bugfuck insane about the nightlife in Brooklyn is the dearth of watering holes that appeal to my particular oddball sensibilities, and for the most part the few that do give me cause to grant them my patronage only meet one of two of my erudite barfly needs. One place may be a charming darker-than-a-mineshaft’s-asshole-at-midnight dive, another may feature reasonably-priced/dirt-cheap drinks, yet another provides a jukebox loaded with tunes straight from my own admittedly eclectic playlist, while still another will attract a clientele of fun-seeking, funny and smart thinkers who are a delight to share conversation and libations with, but no bar that I had previously encountered offered most of those aspects in one location. Consequently, my time spent in bars has dwindled to what to those who know me well would be considered a shocking minimum. (Most of my friends having long ago left the Park Slope area was also a contributing factor to my many lonely and bored nights at home.) Then, about two weeks ago, my old friend and former barbecue joint crewmate, Tracey, got in touch with me to invite me to Woodwork, the pub where she was recently hired on as a bartender. Glad of an excuse to see Tracey again, I made my way to the corner of Vanderbilt Avenue and Dean Street to the bar and I was quite pleasantly surprised by what the place turned out to be.

Upon entering Woodwork, I was immediately taken with its classier-than-expected vibe, but the place nonetheless maintained a feel in which I felt instantly at home (no doubt also aided and abetted by the presence of Tracey). Dark but still well-lit enough to see, walled with brick and accented with an interesting mix of art photography and a smattering of sports accouterments, the place has the ambiance of a well-maintained rec room with being an amicable, entertaining spot in which to leave the cares of the outside world behind for a while its sole mission.

A varied assortment of tunes played — oldies, Dixieland jazz, ‘70’s funk, you name it — as the friendly and skilled staff served up all manner of cold bevvies for grownups, and I was relieved to find the place refreshingly free of the nauseating so-called “hipsters” who plague the areas of Brooklyn within closest proximity to Manhattan. The crow represented a New York utopia of smart and attractive 25-40-somethings, all of whom were mellow, friendly and ready to party like adults who know how to act. There was also a higher than usual concentration of very good-looking women who could hold their liquor and carry conversations ranging from what one would normally expect from a barroom cutie to impressive displays of outright no-bullshit geekery. (I had the occasion to meet a very cute Doctor Who enthusiast who proudly whipped out her sonic screwdriver, so that was all I needed to know.) In other words, the place was the antithesis of several local watering holes that I could name (but won’t).

While not technically a sports bar — the kind of place I would not be caught dead in — Woodwork does cater to the area’s futbol enthusiasts (that’s “soccer” to us Yankee scum) with three large flatscreen TVs showcasing the action, and if you get there on the right night and at the right time there may be other surprises…

The place also has a tiny un-enclosed kitchen that’s in full operation from when the place opens, located right near the front of the bar so you can see every step of the process only a yard or two away as the much-better-than-average fare is prepared. The delicious aromas as the diverse dishes are prepared will tantalize the walk-in customer into trying one of the delicious sandwiches that end up crisped to perfection under the sandwich press. As is to be expected at damned near any bar, the vegetarian patron might find the menu a bit of a tough go, but there are marinated Mozzarella, mixed greens, a roasted veggies sammich, cheese truffle macaroni, nuts, and a few other items to sate the cravings of the meat eschewing. For the rest of us, panoply of eats awaits on a menu where no item costs more than ten bucks. Yes, you read that right, and I can personally attest to both the quality of the chow and the portions served. Among the twenty-five items that comprise your choices can be found the Woodwork pizza, a Gruyere and Brioche grilled cheese sandwich (to which you can add bacon; do it), the “hammy” (ham and Gruyere on a croissant, then schlamped into the sandwich press; “pressed ham” if you will), the tried and true Cubano (accurately prepared), meatloaf made from grass-fed beef, a delicious cheese steak on a crisp bread, grass-fed beef and pulled pork sliders (not blended, but I’m betting something could be negotiated), and even a Cajun bread pudding savory chorizo and a side salad. And allow me to reiterate: nothing on the food menu costs a cent over ten bucks.

There are of course beers on tap, in cans and bottled — a roster currently totaling thirty-four — all for very reasonable prices, and there’s a Monday through Friday Happy Hour from 4PM-7PM with $4.00 draft and well drinks, and the can’t-be-beat “Fuck It Bucket,” which is six cans (of the bartender’s choice) for the price of five, served on ice in a bucket. But the signature item from behind the bar would have to be the infamous “Pickleback,” an bizarre and unexpectedly contemplation-provoking experience that consists of a shot of Evan Williams sour mash, chased with a quarter shot of straight pickle juice. What’s not to love about that?

The bottom line is that Woodwork has a new regular in me, and I strongly urge you make the journey to this fun and welcome class act that’s a stone’s throw from the northern end of Prospect Park. You won’t be disappointed. TRUST YER BUNCHE!!!

Woodwork
583 Vanderbilt Avenue
Prospect heights, Brooklyn
(718) 857-5777
woodworkbk.com