A ROVING GANG OF SHRUB-DEVOURING BAMBI LOOKALIKES DECIMATES THE CONNECTICUT BUNCHE HOMEBASE

A couple of days ago I visited Connecticut for an early celebration of my mom's birthday and while there I was once more treated to the revolving door of fauna that is my old homestead's yard, a place replete with brazen wildlife no matter the time of year. We get groundhogs, foxes, pheasants, raccoons, Tom turkeys and who knows what all else, but the most common sight is that of the roving gangs of deer that infest the area, pitifully driven out of their once secluded woodland haunts by development and now in search of food wherever they can find it. Needless to say, that task is a bitch thanks to the sheer number of disenfranchised deer and as a result the competition for grub is fierce.

Anyway, on Sunday morning I spotted five deer in locations on the front and side of the house, indiscriminately nibbling at any and all leafy sustenance they could find, and for once I was able to photograph them up close and personal without scaring the skittish creatures away. Even my mother, who wages passionate war against them when her flower garden is in season, took pity on the hungry critters and shared in my admiration of their undeniable cuteness. So now, as a break from the usual sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll, giant monsters, comic books and gratuitous violence I usually focus this blog's attention upon, here are the results of my clandestine photo safar from within the confines of the old homestead's living room, family room and dining room.




A long-standing Bunche family mystery solved at last: exactly why the front yard's shrubs bear rather spotty foliage.


A cloven-hooved interloper strolls past the porch where my cronies and I used to get stoned off our asses around two decades ago.

One look at the sad pickings on the bush this deer has chosen as its buffet will give you some idea of just how hard-up these poor wanderers are.

Yeah, it's cute as hell, but the whole time all I could think of was plugging one of the adorable little bastards and carving it up into venison steaks to be seasoned with some salt, pepper and minced garlic before being very slow-cooked on my mom's backyard grill...


And my favorite photo out of the whole lot:

The magnificence of the double-barreled venison moon-shot.