So last night I finally got around to seeing the episode of MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 where Joel and the 'Bots riffed on 1969's horrendous CASTLE OF FU MANCHU, starring a decidedly non-Asian Christopher Lee as the famed stereotypical "yellow peril" mastermind. I missed that one when it first aired back in 1991 and I'm currently in the process of checking out all the ones I missed, so I was especially intrigued by CASTLE OF FU MANCHU because an old friend has sworn up and down for years that it was the absolute rock-bottom worst film the show ever ran. Now that's quite a statement since both MONSTER A GO-GO and MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE both got the treatment, and having seen the film for myself I have to say it doesn't even come close to the aforementioned celluloid atrocities. It may qualify for the Top 10 All-Time Worst anti-pantheon, but #1? No fucking way.That said, I once more pose the question, "What is the all-time worst film ever aired on MST3K?" I got a smattering of answers a while back, but this time really put on your thinking caps and give that query scholarly consideration. This is a question that must be answered, and let's face it, MANOS is damned near impossible to compete with. Write in today!
Nothing is worse than Manos. It is the one MYSTie I have vowed never to watch again if I can help it.
ReplyDeleteThere's some others on the official disks that are boring, but nothing is as bad as Manos.
I like "Time Chasers" because the secret of time travel was figured out on a Commodore 64 and some 5.25 inch floppy disks!
ReplyDeleteMan you hit the hat trick right there.Go-Go, MANOS and Fu Manchu are all terrible, and you really can't go wrong choosing any of them as the worst movie. I do agree with you. Nothing can compete with Manos. But here's a list of runners up not including Go-Go and Fu.
ReplyDeleteEP 818 - Devil Doll: Glacially slow, oppressively dark, boring as hell.
EP 1009 - Hamlet: Bleak brooding play made bleaker and broodinger for German TV.
EP 208 - The Lost Continent: Rock Climbing. 'Nuff said.
EP 806 - The Undead: Roger Corman's incoherent cinematic Cleveland Steamer.
Out of this list, I would have to pick Devil Doll, and while it is truly awful it simply cant hold a candle to the unholy trinity of Go-Go, Fu Manchu and Manos.
Oh man, I completely forgot about EP 612 - The Starfighters.
ReplyDeleteOther than hours of jets refueling mid-air, absolutely nothing happens in this movie. Nothing.
THE STARFIGHTERS is certainly an endurance test, but it does occasionally come to life with moments like that extemporized song about the "Poopy Suit." If I remember correctly it went something like "You do it in your pants, then you do a crazy dance, in your Poopy Suit!"
ReplyDeleteStarfighters would be my #2 pick after Manos. My wife might argue it is worse and I wouldn't blame her for it.
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