While
watching a YouTube video on cartoonist Herb Trimpe, I began to nod off,
so I closed my laptop and gave in to a cat nap. As I slept, I dreamed
of what my mind was telling me was a scene from a vintage Hammer vampire
film that was cut for being too sexually explicit.
In
the dream, Peter Cushing, in his usual Van Helsing vampire hunter role,
approached a bed upon which lay a beautiful female vampire, played by
the lovely Veronica Carlson, whose considerable beauty was amplified by
my subconscious imagination. The alluring revenant, clad in a pretty
much see-through diaphanous gown, welcomed her hunter with beckoning
arms and, though armed with mallet and sharp stake at the ready, he gave
pause. Was he under her baleful hypnotic influence and being
manipulated into misreading the situation, or was the undead vixen
sincerely entreating him for something other than sustenance?
Van
Helsing hesitated for another moment, then slowly put down the
implements of the fanged predator's destruction. With great caution, he
mounted the bed and knelt close to her, her thighs akimbo. Her cold
hands caressed his face, and their touch did not repulse him. She pulled
him close to her face, her eyes partially closed and a smile on her
face that promised pleasures never before enjoyed by mortal man.
Tentatively,
Van Helsing reached out for the gown's décolletage, beneath which the
vampire's heaving bosom held him mesmerized. He clutched the gown an,
losing himself momentarily, he tore the gown down to the fiend's
nethers, eliciting a yelp of surprise from the immortal before him. He
kissed her on the mouth, heedless of his neck's proximity to her
pronounced canines, and she welcomed him, her tongue dead yet
unabashedly piloted by her need.
Van
Helsing took his time kissing his way down her body, savoring her scent
and the the flavor of her sweat. Could a nosferatu sweat? The thought
occupied the clinical portion of his mind for but a moment, then was
gone.
When he was face to face
with her most intimate of places, he stopped himself and gazed into her
cleft, which was in a clear state of arousal and welcome. Throwing all
caution to the wind, Van Helsing descended upon her, consumed with
all-too-human lust as he venerated at her temple. There was no violence,
no feasting on his blood, no killing. In that moment, Van Helsing knew
he had betrayed his profession, but somehow he cared not one whit.
Later,
as sunrise neared, Van Helsing observed the vampire, dozing as the
revenant's cycle of sleep at the end of a night commenced, utterly sated
but not upon her hunter's blood.
Van
Helsing looked at her for what felt like a long time, as sunlight began
to creep into the room falling just short of where his diabolical
inamorata lay. Having made up his mind, Van Helsing closed the shutters
on the room's window and latched them securely. With that gesture, he
departed, conflicted by what had occurred.
As
he made his way down the rocky path from the haunted chateau, he cast a
look back and fought the urge to return and sit guard over the
creature. But such dalliances were for others. This time he'd had the
good fortune to connect with a being whose loneliness echoed his own,
but he resolved never again to cross the line between his sacred calling
and his primal needs.
Yeah, that was a good cat nap!
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