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Sunday, September 13, 2009

PORN TITLES OF THE WEEK

This pair of porn TV parodies take the prize this week as textbook examples of how the makers of this stuff appear to have completely given up trying:

MARRIED...WITH CHILDREN is one of my favorite TV shows to this day thanks to its lowbrow and scabrous sense of "guy" humor, elements that make it a natural for translation into porn, but the lack of a clever parody title here is a disappointment. Why not something like, oh, VARIED...WITH CHILDREN, for a porno chock-a-block with every sex act imaginable? I know it's not a very good title but at least I gave it a shot, which is more than can be said for this DVDs makers. Then again, that title may imply the participation of underage talent and that's just icky, so how about VARIED...WITH JIZM? I think Al Bundy would have appreciated that one, although I don't think he'd dig the idea of Bud and Kelly getting it on (and neither would they), or the image of red-headed Peggy noshing on an engorged cock like it was a Good Humor Bomb Pop (which is depicted on the disc's back cover, but is far too explicit for me to run here). Not that I haven't had some very interesting thoughts about Peg Bundy myself, but that's another story...

And this one's a huge disappointment from a creative parody title standpoint because it's such an obvious no-brainer. Seriously, how the hell did they not come up with 30 ROCK-HARD? I weep for the state of the porno industry...

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