WACKO NEWS STORY OF THE WEEK-"I'M KILLING A VAMPIRE!!!"

I've said it before and I'll say it again, there is no crazier place to live on earth than the five boroughs of the Big Apple.

From the Staten Island Advance-

Saturday, June 30, 2007
By GLENN NYBACK
Disturbed man batters peacock outside restaurant
STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. — A peacock had to be put down after being cruelly beaten and kicked outside a Tottenville fast-food restaurant Thursday morning, and its assailant is still on the loose.

Witnesses said a man in his late teens or early 20s grabbed the helpless bird by its neck, struck it repeatedly with a baseball bat and kicked it in a Burger King parking lot on Page Avenue. He then jumped onto the hood of a car and threw the peacock to the ground before running off when he saw police. "He said 'I'm killing a vampire,'" said Felicia Finnegan, 19, who works at the Burger King and had been feeding bread to the peacock in the parking lot just after 7:30 a.m. Miss Finnegan had gone out to look at the bird, an uncommon sight on Staten Island. Shortly after going back into the restaurant, she heard the man screaming and saw him rip off his shirt before stepping on and kicking the bird. "He was really beating it. I just think it was sick and demented. He shouldn't be walking around on the street," said Miss Finnegan.

The peacock never had a chance.

"We brought it back to our care center on [Veterans Road] but the injuries were so extreme, we had to put the animal down for humane reasons," said Richard Gentles, a spokesman for Animal Care & Control of New York City. "He was beaten so severely that some of the feathers fell out at the scene and others fell out at the care center. It's a horrible, horrible situation."

Miss Finnegan's mother, Sandra, said her daughter was hysterical after the brutal incident. "What if somebody is walking around with a baby ... and he thinks it's a vampire in a stroller?" she asked. "It's horrible. I'm just amazed that it went on."

The beauteous bird's presence in Tottenville was explained by George Burke of Prince's Bay, who has raised peacocks for several years and gave some to a Tottenville resident a few years ago. He was appalled when told what happened. "What's wrong with parents who let kids turn into [expletive] like that?" he asked. "I think the kid needs a little bit of psychological evaluation. Oh, what a shame."

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Think about it, kiddies; a Burger King, a fucking peacock, and a deranged vampire-slayer, and the shit actually happened. Fuck, I LOVE NEW YORK!!!