Happy Chinese new Year, everybody! It's the year of the tiger, so get down and celebrate, kung fu-style! Sing with me, chirren: "They were funky Chinamen/From funky Chinatown..."
Carl Douglas' 1974 international #1 hit single, "Kung Fu Fighting," the inexplicable popularity of which provides conclusive proof that everybody in the Seventies was stoned.
Fu Manchu: poster boy for "yellow peril" and a personal role model. Hey, if you're going to take over the world, at least have the decency to dress like a pimp and be as much of an arrogant asshole as possible.
The Chan Clan: defiantly proving that a pack of cartoon Chinese can rock just as blandly as Josie & The Pussycats or The Neptunes. And that Suzie Chan...Yowza!!!
Shang-Chi, master of kung fu and perhaps Marvel Comics' most proficient non-superpowered badass. All you Danny Rand boosters can leck mich im arsch (as Mozart so eloquently put it).