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Monday, August 18, 2008


Yer Bunche, once more pondering the imponderable, decked out in a happening Sinestro Corps emblem (hey, chicks dig it).

The Casting Game. Anyone who's ever had even the slightest interest in comics has played it, namely sitting around and bullshitting about who would be ideal in the role of any given hero, villain or supporting character ever to grace the four-color page should a movie about whatever comic spawned them be announced as gearing up to hit the big screen. We played the Casting Game all the time during my Marvel Bullpen days, and to this day I often find myself ruminating on decent choices to essay my favorite characters in a celluloid adaptation, especially what with this summer's unprecedented spate of superhero flicks, comics-derived or otherwise.

Anyway, I recently reread the largely entertaining SINESTRO CORPS WAR, a multi-issue "event" that ran through GREEN LANTERN and GREEN LANTERN CORPS — two of my must-read monthly comics — last year, and while reading it I pondered a possible Hollywood treatment of the material; I was less interested in who would play Hal Jordan, the Green Lantern of space sector 2814 (yeah, I'm a geek), than who would work well as Sinestro, Jordan's former mentor and later arch-nemesis.

An early cover appearance by Sinestro. And what the Hell's up with Hal's hair?

As a character, Sinestro's supposed to be a formidible foe when it comes to ring-slinging and general, all-around evil, and depending on how he's written and drawn he can come off as a bit of a snob and a somewhat fey, homicidal martinet, so the casting for him would be kind of tricky. But worry not, Hollywood! I'm gonna throw you a freebie, provided you keep an open mind and just go with me on this. My choice for Sinestro is so perfect that it'll make you cry: John Waters.

John Waters: the "Pope of Trash," genius bad taste director, hilarious humorist, born to play a burgundy-skinned extraterrestrial despot and asshole.

I know it sounds insane, but think about it for a minute. Until fairly recently Sinestro wasn't necessarily illustrated to look like a physical powerhouse, his strength instead stemming from an indomitable and "my way or the highway" attitude, so Waters' lanky build would only serve to accent non-physical deadliness. And as for the inevitable trading of verbal abuse that is par for the course in superheroic conflicts, can you imagine anyone who'd be better at uttering scathing rejoinders or putdowns than Waters? The withering disdain he's capable of would have Hal Jordan doing a better job of shrinking than Ray Palmer, I guarantee it! And that kind of attitude would only make fighting him that much more frustrating, and I would love to see it happen on multiplex screens across the nation.

The more recent "butch" version of Sinestro. All he needs is a Baltimore accent.

Think you've got a better suggestion? Write in to the comments section and say your piece!


Anonymous said...

How about Steve Buscemi? I heard John Waters once say in an interview that if he ever made an autobiographical movie, he would cast Buscemi as himself.

I could also see Richard E. Grant, the dude from Withnail and I.


John Bligh said...

Alas, John Waters is now far too old to pull off the part. Steve Buscemi or that dude from "House" might work, though...

Bunche said...

I disagree about Waters being too old for the part. Sinestro was a seasoned Green Lantern when he met Hal Jordan, even considered the greatest in history until Jordan, so he was probably the equivalent to forty-something then. He'd also been an accomplished anthropologist on his homeworld before becoming a GL, so figure in another ten years at least, so with the years since Jordan took up the ring until the "now" of the DCU we're looking at quite some time, so don't count Waters out.

Anonymous said...

Steve Buscemi would make an excellent choice, but how about Vincent Gallo, circa Buffalo 66? Vincent would make a sexy, scruffy Sinestro! - Xtina

Bunche said...

Vincent Gallo?!!? No way; he's too young, and the scruffy/sexy vibe is 100% the polar opposite of the character.